Don't Pay the Price by Doing the Work Twice
Have you ever hired someone for help around the house, and you immediately regretted it?
You know, I've had my fair share of unhelpful helpers over the years.
In fact, I remember a time when I hired cleaners that didn't leave my house as clean as they promised.
You see, my family is pretty good about keeping our home tidy.
But, every once in a while, we'll hire someone to come out and take care of the deep cleaning we sometimes can't get to.
You know, it's the stuff like wiping down the baseboards, dusting in high places, cleaning the ovens, and otherwise getting into those deep nooks and crannies.
Well, one day, we needed help cleaning, and having recently moved to Pennsylvania, we were looking for a new crew.
And so, after doing our research online and calling around, three nice ladies showed up at our home one afternoon and offered to give us a "deep clean" for what seemed like a reasonable price.
Well, as they got to work, it immediately became clear that they wouldn't be able to get the job done in the time they had allotted for the work.
And how did I know this?
Well, they didn't have the same hustle or focus on their work as other professionals that we had hired in the past.
And wouldn't you know it, as soon as I left to pick up the kids from school, the crew took off.
And you know the biggest disappointment in all of this was that I could have done the work myself.
But, I just wanted to use my money to buy back some of my time so I could spend it with the family.
And because of this bad hire, I was left paying the price for the same work twice.
Have you ever found yourself in a similar situation?
Have you ever hired someone to help you out, but they didn't meet your expectations?
Well, having lived in different parts of the country and having hired plenty of contractors, here's one of the biggest lessons I learned when it comes to hiring help:
If you want to achieve your desired outcome and effectively buy back your time, then it's crucial to have a clear set of expectations and a personal definition of success for your project before you get started.
That's because having clarity not only prevents common pitfalls like cost overruns, unnecessary complications, and potential disappointments.
It also ensures that you can devote more of your time to what truly matters: like family, close relationships, and developing your passion pursuits.
So then, by clearly defining your success criteria and selecting help wisely, you'll be able to optimize the cost and quality of the service you receive.
But more importantly, by taking this approach you’re likely setting yourself up to effectively buy back more of your time in the future.
Buying Back Your Time
So, why should you even care about who or why you're hiring around your house in the first place?
Well, simply put, it's because you have better things to do with your time.
Here's the thing: given where you're at in your career, you've likely earned the ability to buy back your time.
In fact, you're likely in a position where you're juggling the demands of a high-earning career, nurturing your family, and starting to focus on what your legacy looks like, right?
So then, given all the responsibilities on your plate, you very well know that making the most of every single minute of your day is essential.
That's why it's crucial to think about hiring help around the house, whether that's cleaners, gardeners, nannies, contractors, or personal assistants, not just as an expense but as a strategic investment in your future.
You see, as Joe Dominguez points out in his book, "Your Money or Your Life," time is one of our most precious assets.
Because here's the thing: you can't buy any more of it.
But, you can use your wealth to delegate tasks to people who can help you get your time back.
In fact, by delegating daily chores and maintenance tasks on the regular, what you're doing is effectively, you guessed it, buying back your time.
So then, you can use this bought-back time to do the things that add more value to your life and that move you closer to your long-term goals.
But, it's one thing to hire out the work.
And it's another to actually get someone to show up who will actually take things off your plate in a way that adds value over the long term.
That's why what I'm talking about here is more than just getting help.
Instead, it's about creating more room in your life so you can thrive in the areas that matter most to you.
So then, when you approach the act of hiring help around the house as an investment in your quality of life rather than just another cost, it becomes a powerful tool to enhance your life and ultimately help you manage your busy lifestyle more effectively.
The Costs of Not Knowing What You Want
Alright, so now that you know that you need to be mindful about how you hire help, you’re all set, right?
Well, not so fast.
Because, here's the thing: without a clear plan or a clear understanding of what you want to have accomplished, you could end up with projects that are over budget on costs, under-delivered in terms of quality, and inefficient in terms of time management.
How so?
Well, let me tell you another story.
It's a story about a family, maybe much like yours or mine, who decided to build an addition on to their home.
In fact, this was no ordinary addition.
This family had planned on adding a whole new floor to the top of their house.
Now, the head of this household was Tom.
And Tom was a skilled builder but already had a lot on his plate.
So then, Tom teamed up with a contractor friend named Brian to help tackle this big project.
Now, at first, things seemed to get off to a good start.
That's because Tom's family started with intangible dreams and translated them into tangible blueprints.
And so, they thought they had done all the right things to prepare for a beautiful transformation.
Well, construction got underway, and Tom's family was excited to see how the structure of a new second floor was taking shape.
They were talking about how, in just a matter of months, they'd finally have the home they'd been dreaming about for so long.
But before they could get to the finishing touches, Tom began noticing something odd as the bills started coming in.
Something just didn't add up.
The numbers, the costs, they were off, and by a lot.
Now, Tom was keen to keeping a close eye on building expenses and noticed charges for materials that never made it to their house.
In fact, these were charges for materials that they didn't even need and that certainly weren't being used in their renovation.
So, Tom did what any other reasonable person would do, and he brought this up with contractor, Brian.
Now, Tom expected a simple explanation.
But instead of clarity, Tom received defiance.
That's because Brian insisted that everything his crew ordered was used in the build.
But, having been a builder himself, Tom knew this just wasn't true.
Well, push came to shove, and Brian eventually walked away from the job, leaving the family with an unfinished home and a looming legal battle.
But ultimately, in court, it came out that the contractor's crew had been ordering extra materials on Tom's dime that they were using for their own side projects.
So then, eventually, the judge ruled in the family's favor about the unused materials.
But, Tom's family was left with an unfinished home, including no electrical, no plumbing, and no roof: just a shell of what was supposed to be.
Now, what's the point of this story?
Well, while Tom clearly laid out his expectations about how the addition was supposed to be built, he fell short in the selection of his contractor.
You see, Tom placed too much trust in Brian without first establishing the right sort of expectations for how they'd work together.
It was his friend, right?
Well, there's a good reason they say you shouldn't mix business with pleasure.
Because ultimately for Tom, it led to Brian's crew taking advantage of his family and also led to a failed home improvement project.
You know, when it comes down to it, you don't want to pay the price for the same work twice.
What Happens if You Don't Know What You Want
So then this brings us to our next point about hiring help and that's hiring for the right fit.
Because here's the thing: if you don't step into this decision with a clear idea of how you want your helpers to work with you, then you might find yourself facing not just a logistical mess but with an emotional one too.
How so?
Well, what I'm talking about here involves more than just dissatisfaction with unfinished or poorly done tasks.
No, what I'm talking about here gets at your and my core need to feel in control, to feel secure, and to feel like we're capable of making the right choices, right?
Now, up to now, you've likely prided yourself on your ability to smoothly manage things in your professional or personal life.
You've got your daily calendar dialed in, and you likely always start your week by planning out your schedule to ensure you're making the most of your time.
But this week, things aren't going as planned.
That's because the help you hired is not meeting your expectations.
In fact, now you're spending more time managing the helpers than focusing on what you were supposed to use that extra time for, right?
So what happens now?
Well, deep down, I'm guessing that you're feeling a mix of frustration and disappointment.
And there's this nagging thought that maybe, maybe you could have done the job better yourself than to have hired the help in the first place.
So then, the issue isn't just about the financial cost.
No, it's about feeling like you've failed at something as personal as creating the right environment for your family because you really weren't able to buy back your time.
And you know, the truth is that you likely had an implicit expectation that hiring this individual should have made your life easier and more enjoyable, right?
So then, when it doesn't happen as expected, it can feel like a personal setback.
How so?
Well, let me tell you what I mean here.
So last spring, I decided to hire a landscaper to help out around the house.
Now, this is work that I'd typically do myself, like mowing, edging, pruning, and generally keeping the yard around the house looking neat and tidy.
In fact, it's work that I generally enjoy doing, but I decided that it was time to buy back my time.
That's because with several changes taking place in my life, I knew that I could really use a few extra hours per week all to myself to relax and recharge.
But ultimately, hiring this help gave me peace of mind knowing that someone was going to come by at a set time each week to take this work off my hands.
Now, this wasn't the first time I hired a landscaper.
In fact, years ago, just after my oldest was born, I hired a landscaper to help out around the house in anticipation of spending more time with my newborn baby.
And back then, I got lucky because the people I hired nailed the work without me saying much about it at all.
They cut the grass, and edged the lawn.
They took care of the weeds growing between the cracks in my walkway without my saying anything about it.
And, they even cleaned the flowerbeds and carried away the leaves instead of filling up my garbage cans.
This crew took care of everything in a way like they were reading my mind.
But you know, back then, I must have simply been lucky or something.
Because last year, I didn't have the same experience.
In fact, I had to call the landscaper back out to my house multiple times to finish mowing the lawn because they missed a few spots.
I even patiently and carefully described what needed to be done, but the poor guy still couldn't get it.
And you know, the way this crew was set up, there was one guy who would come by to mow, and another guy would come by days later to edge the lawn.
It even got to the point where I didn't know when this crew would show up.
Some weeks, the lawn was taken care of, but other would go by, and I'd be staring at an overgrown lawn.
It got to the point that driving by my own home was stressing me out.
It got to the point that I wanted to mow my own lawn, but I felt frustrated because I was already paying someone to do the work, you know?
Well, long story short, I ended up parting ways with this crew and going back to taking care of business around the house.
So, what's the point?
Well, the point here is that this bad hire led to an emotional toll.
That's because the discomfort of dealing with subpar work or the need to micromanage work around the house reminded me of earlier times in my life when I felt out of control or when my financial decisions didn't pan out despite my best efforts.
In essence, the negative experience wasn't so much about the cost, as it was about the emotional toll it had taken on my life.
It was about how my attempt to buy back my time actually backfired and cost me more than it was worth.
So for you then, the lesson here from my experience is that not hiring the right fit can lead to unnecessary frustrations.
That's why getting your hiring decisions right the first time is so crucial.
It's not just about efficiency.
It's also about maintaining your emotional balance and ensuring that your home remains a sanctuary, not a source of stress.
How to Avoid Paying the Price Twice
Alright, so then, what can you do to ensure that you're hiring the right help and not paying the price for the same work twice?
Step #1: Clearly Define Success
Well, you can start by clearly defining success.
Now, this work involves gaining clarity on what you want to have accomplish before you actually go out and hire help.
You see, without a clear vision of what success looks like, the work that your helpers show up to do can become disjointed and ineffective.
But, with clear goals, you get clear actions, which in turn result in clear outcomes.
That's why, one of this first things that I do when I go looking for help is to start by defining what success looks like to me.
What I'm doing here is aligning all my efforts and resources toward achieving that defined objective.
And so, where do you begin?
Well, what I typically do is ask myself, "What specific outcomes do I expect to see once the project is complete?"
Here, you're not focused on "how" the work is supposed to be done.
Instead, you're turning your attention to the "what," or more specifically, what you want to see this individual or crew bring into reality.
Now, defining clarity might involve researching similar projects, getting to know industry standards, or even consulting with experts so you can set appropriate expectations.
Either way, what you'll want to do is to prioritize your non-negotiables.
Then, be ready to articulate your vision clearly and effectively once you start engaging with potential service providers.
Step #2: Hire for Outcomes, Not Cost
Now, one of the biggest mistakes I’ve made in the past is to base my hiring decisions solely on price alone.
That's because, more often than not, those low-cost providers are likely focused on quantity instead of quality.
And, you know, going with a low-cost provider is likely to turn you into another job that they simply rush through instead of focusing on you a highly valued client.
That's why when you're hiring for outcome, what you're doing is ensuring that the quality of work meets your needs and expectations and that it aligns with the goals you've meticulously set out in step one.
And so here, when I'm getting ready to hire help, one of the things I ask is, "Is my intended hire truly committed to my defined outcome?"
In other words, are they willing to go the extra mile to give me what I want, or am I just another job that they need to get through?
So then, to figure this out, what I've found works best is to have candidates describe what the end results will look like. But what I’m listening for is not how they’re doing the work, but what their vision for the work will look like.
In other words, instead of telling them how they should do their job, I'll go back to step 1 and articulate what success looks like to me.
So then, if they can reiterate back to me my own vision, then I know that we’re likely on the same page.
Remember, you don't want to pay the price by doing the same work twice.
Step #3: Have a Backup Plan in Place
Finally, when it comes to hiring effectively, I want to ensure that I have a backup plan in place to deal with the inevitable hiccup.
Whether it's a house that isn't cleaned to your standards, a garden that's neglected, or a home repair that's incomplete, these letdowns can disrupt your routine at best and cost you all the time you thought you had bought back at worst.
That's why being prepared for these eventualities is crucial in maintaining the smooth operation of your household and helps ensure that your family's well-being is taken care of.
So then, the number one question I ask of a service professional before I hire them is, "How will you make the situation right if the work goes wrong?"
Here, what I look for is someone to tell me more than, "we'll take care of you" or "you have nothing to worry about…"
Because the truth is that a lot has changed in recent years, so yes, I do have a lot to worry about.
That's why you'll want to ensure that your contract or service agreement includes clauses that address non-delivery or non-performance and how those situations might be resolved.
Don't Pay the Price by Doing the Work Twice
You know, when it comes down to it, hiring help in your personal life is one of the most effective ways of buying back your time.
At the same time, it could very well turn into a fruitless effort if you don't approach hiring it from a place of intention.
That's why I take the time to first clearly define what success means to me.
Then, as I'm screening candidates, I communicate these goals clearly to my helpers and have a backup plan just in case things don't work out.
Remember, your ability to get the most out of your service provider starts with you.
That's because if you don't clearly communicate your expectations when you hire them, you could end up with problems that go beyond money.
Indeed, without a clear plan, you could risk facing projects that cost too much, you could experience subpar service, or you could wake up with even less time on your hands than when you started.
But think for a moment how your life would change if you ended up getting it right.
Imagine what you could do with an extra 5, 10, or 20 hours per week if you just took a few minutes now to define exactly what you need and what you expect from those you invite into your home to help.
That's why, if you're in the market to hire help, it's essential to start with clarity and purpose in what you want accomplished.
Because by doing so, you're not only buying back your time, you're taking one step closer to becoming the master of your own financial independence journey.
If You Don't Write Your Story, Someone Else Will
"How do I want to be remembered?"
You know, the older I get, the more I linger on this question.
And it's not because I'm intentionally looking for ways to gain notoriety.
Instead, I've come to realize that I only have a finite amount of time to get done what I was put on this earth to do.
The reality is that, over time, my priorities have changed.
You know, the motorcycle life that I once was so fond of in my youth is now long gone.
And today, when I think about working out, it's more about staving off heart disease than it is toning down my waistline.
But when it comes to how I want to be remembered, I'm reminded of a truly impactful quote that I recently came across that said, "In 100 years, no one will remember who you are."
It's shocking to think about, right?
In a way, I'm sure you likely already knew that intuitively.
I mean, can you remember your great-grandfather's name without looking it up or asking a relative?
I start getting depressed just thinking about it!
But here's the thing: instead of looking at this quote as being a cause for disappointment, I've used it as my inspiration to purposefully write my life's story.
You see, in 100 years, few people will care about what corporate title I earned, how much money I made, the square footage of my home , or all the toys I've owned.
But they'll likely be interested in my legacy, or rather, the story of what I did with my life.
Have you thought about your legacy lately?
Have you thought about what folks will say about you in 100 years?
And no, I'm not talking about the monetary inheritance that you could leave behind.
Instead, your legacy is the story that you want people tell about you when you’re not here to tell it yourself
But here's the thing though: your legacy can only be as solid as the vision for the ideal world that you're trying to bring into reality in the right here and now.
It's something that you can make happen right now; it's not something that magically happens in the future.
That's why, if you want to create a story worth remembering, then you need to prioritize daily activities that are aligned with your legacy-building vision.
Because if you don't, in 100 years, someone else will write your story.
What's Keeping You from Writing Our Story
So then, what does it look like when someone else writes your story?
Well, consider the story of Nikola Tesla.
Now, as you'll likely recall, Tesla was an inventor and engineer known for his contributions to the development of many things you use today.
These include things like alternating current (AC) electricity, wireless communication, and a number of other innovations that you can look up on the web.
Here's the thing, though: Tesla's legacy has been shaped by historians in ways that emphasize certain aspects of his life while leaving out others.
How so?
Well, many times, historians will portray Tesla as an eccentric genius who struggled financially and was overshadowed by Thomas Edison.
In other words, he failed because he didn't get rich like Edison, right?
Now, the trouble here is that this portrayal of Tesla's legacy has created a narrative that often focuses on his rivalry with Edison and his financial difficulties instead of his genuine passion for science and innovation.
That's because, by many accounts, Tesla was deeply dedicated to advancing technology for the betterment of humanity.
And this dedication is evident in his numerous patents and contributions to various fields, including electricity, radio, and wireless communications.
Ultimately, Tesla had a visionary approach to his inventions and was more focused on their potential societal impact than his own personal gain.
In other words, he wasn't as concerned about the money as he was about the work, but the story that was written about him put the emphasis on money.
And that likely came from the comparison between him and Edison.
Now, had Tesla been able to shape his narrative more effectively, he might have been remembered differently.
He might have been remembered not only for his scientific genius but also for his integrity and commitment to making the world a better place through his inventions.
Maybe, had Tesla been a little more thoughtful with his finances, he'd have been better known today as a visionary who made a big impact, instead of the guy that got beat out by Edison, right?
Indeed, your legacy goes beyond how you want to be remembered. It's about the impact you make through every little daily choice you make today.
Daily Distractions
Now, the trouble is that so many of us want to do good.
We want to make an impact in our families, in our communities, and in the world around us.
And now, certainly, you likely want to make an impact and do the right thing on a daily basis, right?
The trouble is that outside obstacles often distract you from focusing on your long-term goals.
Indeed, in the context of building a legacy, you'll likely face a host of daily distractions like emails, social media notifications, and urgent but not important tasks that compete for attention.
And these distractions tend to pull you away from activities that would otherwise contribute meaningfully to your vision for the future.
In fact, these external distractors are relentless and seemingly everywhere.
And you know, the trouble is that they make it very hard for you to stay focused on what truly matters because your attention is constantly being pulled from one fire that you need to put out to another.
You're doing busy work, but you're not making any progress.
And so, all those well-intentioned plans that you had laid out with your family or the time you planned to contribute to your local non-profit are once again put on the back burner.
Now, here's the thing: this constant tug-of-war between the immediate demands of life and your long-term goals can lead to a disconnect.
That is, it inflames those feelings of frustration and a sense that the demands of everyday life are diluting your efforts.
But, where you give your time and energy is your choice.
Because, if you don't write your story, someone else will.
Internal Struggles
Now, oftentimes, those daily distractions aren't a cause but an effect.
In other words, what if you're staying busy because you want to avoid thinking about the bigger picture of life?
Let me tell you what I'm talking about here: You see, in the early 1970s, there was this psychologist by the name of Wayne Oates, who found himself grappling with his own relentless compulsion to work.
He found himself distracted by external things, or so he thought.
Now, this wasn't just about being sucked into the nine-to-five grind.
In reality, Oates was dealing with an internal struggle and he couldn't understand his compulsion to work so much.
Have you ever felt this way? Have you ever felt the need to be the one to turn out the lights in the office at night?
And so, he did some digging. He looked internally and used his own professional observations to eventually give a name to his struggles, which he called "workaholism."
And so, as part of this discovery process, Oates ended up writing a book called, "The Confessions of a Workaholic: The Facts About Work Addiction."
Now, the book starts off with an account of Oates' own life experiences and offers an inside look at how his work consumed his life, including how it cost him his personal relationships and his health.
But here's why this all matters. Oates helps give us a modern-day definition of workaholism.
He helps us understand how our own internal struggles often manifest as external issues that distract us from doing the essential things in life.
Now, you likely already have your own definition of workaholism.
But let's go back to the original definition as Oates describes it, because it's quite telling.
Now, Oates defines workaholism as an uncontrollable need to work incessantly, where an individual is internally compelled to work hard, often exceeding what is required.
But the big question here is, "why?"
What would compel an individual to behave this way, right?
Well, that's what Oates talks about in his book.
And so, Oates goes on to talk about how traits like perfectionism, a need for control, and fear of emotional intimacy can drive a person deeper into the arms of their work.
But the big takeaway here is that the struggles that individuals face internally, often lead them to mask their problems with external solutions.
That's why, ignoring the internal struggles of doubt and uncertainty when it comes to writing your life story can result in a lack of decisive action towards building your legacy.
So what happens if you don't do anything?
What if you think you're doing something, but in reality, you're just engaging in busy work?
Well, there's a cost.
And the emotional toll can include a persistent sense of dissatisfaction and the haunting question of "what if?" when it's too late, like:
What if I had started that side hustle?
What if I made it to my kid's ball games more often?
What if I took more time with that precious relationship?
What if?
What if...
You know, if you don't write your story, someone else will.
How to Write Your Own Story
So then, what can you do to move past the internal and external struggles and get to a place where you can begin write your own story and building a legacy you want to leave behind?
Step #1: Identify Your Values
Well, the first thing you'll want to do is to take the time to identify and get to know your values. Now, you'll likely recall that your values are not the things you aspire to be, but rather, they're the things that are important to you right now.
Now, this distinction between aspiration and actuality is crucial because aspirations are often externally influenced, while what you really value is often something internally important to you.
In other words, you're born with it.
Indeed, these are things that you would genuinely care about if no one was standing around watching what you're doing.
But for now, what you need to know is that gaining clarity on what is truly essential allows you to filter out the noise and focus on what genuinely matters to you and to the legacy you're creating.
And so, by defining your core values and the ultimate impact you want to leave behind, you can prioritize the actions and decisions that align directly with your life's purpose.
And how exactly do you go about doing this work?
Well, you can start by asking yourself, "Do I truly understand what's essential in my life, and if not, how can I find out?"
One thing you can do here is to take the time to complete a values assessment.
At the very least, review resources like James Clear's Core Values List.
Either way, I've covered the topic of values discovery in previous posts and episodes, so be sure to check out those resources at https://legacygenone.com.
But doing this work will give you a solid base from which to make your decisions.
Step #2: Practice Deathbed Meditation
Now, the next thing you'll want to do visualize what happens in your world after you’re gone.
And one helpful approach to this end is to practice Maranasati meditation or otherwise known as deathbed meditation.
And what exactly is Maranasati meditation, you ask?
Well, Maranasati meditation is a type of meditation that helps you not only think about but also accept the idea of death.
And so, why would you want to take the time to think about dying?
Well, this kind of meditation encourages you to think about how death is a natural part of life and to appreciate how everything in life is truly temporary.
That's because, when practicing Maranasati meditation, you might imagine what happens when you die or think about the process of your body getting older and eventually not working at all.
The goal here isn't to make you scared but to help you value life more fully and to worry less about minor problems.
So then, by frequently thinking about death in a calm way, what you're actually doing is giving yourself the ability to enjoy your life even more.
And how exactly is this possible?
Well, that's because you start to learn how to live in the moment and not get too upset about things that are impermanent or simply don't matter.
Ultimately, this meditation can help you feel more at peace and ready to handle whatever life throws your way.
So then to do this, start by asking yourself, "In my final moments, who will I be surrounded by and how will they remember me?"
Then, consider all of the values you've identified in the previous step and find a quiet space to reflect on your life as if in your final moments.
Consider the alignment between your current path, or the daily choices you're making today, and your deepest values.
Then, use this reflection to set intentions or goals that bring you closer to your ideal life vision, and keep track of these insights for future guidance.
Step #3: Take Daily, Incremental Steps
Now, the last thing that you'll want to consider as you're intentionally writing your story is to focus on your most important actions.
These are the things that you want to be doing each and every day to get you on your path and move you closer to your ideal version of your life story.
And so, what does this look like?
Well, consider the story of Mike Flint.
Now, Flint was Warren Buffett's personal pilot.
And you remember Buffett, right?
The Oracle from Omaha?
The billionaire investor?
Well, before working for Buffett, Flint had flown for four U.S. Presidents.
And so, by many measures, he was an accomplished pilot. But he was looking for more.
So then, as Flint tells it, one day, he approaches Buffett looking for advice on furthering his career.
So, what did Buffett do?
Well, Buffett asked Flint to list his top 25 career goals and then circle the top five most important ones.
At this point, Flint thought that he would work on his top five goals immediately and then focus on the remaining 20 when he had free time, right?
Well, it didn't work out that way.
That's because Buffett gave Flint a surprising instruction: He told Flint he should avoid the 20 uncircled items at all costs until he had achieved his top five goals.
These uncircled items, Buffett explained, are not just distractions but also potential traps that could divert his energy and focus away from his most critical objectives.
Now, this isn't a one-size-fits-all solution.
Not everyone can have a single-minded focus and achieve the top things in their life at the cost of other priorities.
But, Buffett's advice not only highlights the importance of focusing on your highest priorities and also underscores the necessity of avoiding less critical tasks that can impede significant progress.
That's why you'll want to take the time now to think about the small steps you need to take each and every day to move you closer to the story you want to write.
With that said, I'm not talking about doing work for work's sake.
More specifically, you'll want to make sure that you match your actions to your values.
It's about taking intentional daily steps.
It's like making sure each puzzle piece fits so you can see the big picture of your dream life coming true.
So then, to begin, you'll want to take the time to ask yourself, "What do I need to do today to live in alignment with my values?"
Then, every day, try to do one small thing that shows you what's really important, whether that's being more kind or more helpful to others.
Remember, it's okay to make mistakes; the most essential part here is to keep trying to live by your own value system, not what you think others want for you.
Ultimately, the point here is to do one thing today that moves you closer to where you want to go.
So then, don’t let another day pass you by.
Go grab a pen, outline your vision, and commit to one small step today that brings you closer to the legacy you dream of.
If You Don't Write Your Story, Someone Else Will
Remember, the story of your life is yours to write.
If you're anything like me, you'll likely want to be proud to hear what your family or loved ones have to say when they tell it.
That's because if you don't take charge and define the legacy you want to leave behind, you risk allowing life's daily hustle and others' agendas to shape your path and the steps you take.
Remember, each day spent without aligning your actions to your true purpose is a missed opportunity to forge a meaningful legacy.
Ultimately, the world will remember you not just for your good intentions but for what you did with your time.
So then, you'll likely want to make sure it's a reflection of your true aspirations. Because if you don't write your story, someone else will.
But, what if you do end up writing your story the way you want it to be read?
Imagine what could unfold in your life today if you decided to prioritize what truly matters.
Picture a future where, each day, you commit to small, deliberate actions that align seamlessly with your deepest values and aspirations.
That's why it's crucial to not wait for another year to wonder what could have been.
Start now, start today so you can not only begin defining what’s truly important to you, but so you can write your own story by taking one step closer to becoming the master of your own financial independence journey.
Torchbearers: Raising Kids Who Care About Your Legacy
Who will tell your great tales and your family's story when you're gone?
Now, if your first inclination is to say, "I hope it's my children," then your situation might not be as definitive as you think.
The truth is that in about three generations, you will be forgotten without a proactive approach to keep your story alive.
You see, the fact is that a lot of work goes into passing along your family's legacy.
To be sure, Native American cultures, who are known for their oral storytelling traditions, put a great deal of forethought into raising up the next generation of storytellers, which often starts from childhood.
Now, sure, you can keep a journal, write a memoir, or even produce a family legacy video to preserve and share your story.
But here's the thing: you'll still need an interested party to engage with the content you create.
And the thing is that people want to hear from people.
So then, who will pass along your family's story for generations to come?
That's where your torchbearers come into play.
These individuals will be responsible for keeping your family's story alive and carrying along your family's traditions.
However, to effectively pass your legacy from one generation to the next, you'll want to ensure that your family has a shared set of values from the start.
You'll also need to identify the right person in your family to carry your family's story, and then you need to do the work to raise up the next generation of torchbearers.
Indeed, this approach is not just about ensuring that your memory lasts well beyond your passing; when done right, it will provide a living guide that influences decision-making, instills values, and ensures the continuity of your family's legacy in an ever-changing world.
Ultimately, this work is about giving your family a head start so that future generations don't have to constantly reinvent the wheel so they can pursue their own measure of happiness.
Instilling Ideals and Values
Alright, so one of the first things that you'll want to do when it comes to raising up your family's torchbearer is to start with your family's values.
Indeed, building a legacy that lasts the test of time is about much more than just the wealth you accumulate, it's about the values and ideals you instill in your family.
That's why, as you're starting out as a first-gen wealth builder, your journey starts by embedding a strong foundation of core values that guide every action and decision your family makes.
Identify Your Core Family Values
And, you can think of your family's core values as the guiding stars for your collective journey.
Now, these aren't just abstract concepts but the principles that you live by every day.
Whether it's the importance of honesty in all dealings, the commitment to giving back to the community, or the relentless pursuit of excellence, these values define who you are as a family.
It's your family's DNA and is passed on from one generation to the next.
That's why creating a family values statement is a powerful way to articulate these ideals.
Now, we've discussed a number of formal and informal ways to identify your family's values in past articles.
But for now, you could start as simply as sitting down with your entire family and discussing what each person believes is most important.
Here, you've got the chance to listen, understand, and come together to craft a statement that reflects the collective heart of your family.
This process not only clarifies your family's values but also strengthens your tribe's bond together.
That's why getting everyone involved in defining and expressing these values is crucial.
So then, while creating a basic values statement is a good start, you'll also want to consider organizing regular family retreats where you can dive deeper into these discussions.
These retreats can become a sacred time for your family to connect, reflect, and align on your shared values.
It's about ensuring everyone, from the youngest to the oldest, understands and feels connected to these guiding principles.
It's a way to go back to your values statement and ensure that it reflects your family's story and that you haven't missed any crucial points about what makes your family unique.
Identifying and Supporting Torchbearers
Alright, once your family's foundation of ideals and values is firmly in place, the next critical step is identifying and supporting the torchbearers within your family.
Now, it's crucial to note here that these individuals don't just serve as scribes or reporters.
That's because they'll become the living embodiment of your family's values and, thus, need to be motivated and capable of leading in a way that sustains your family's legacy.
Defining Leadership Roles
Indeed, torchbearers are those within your family who naturally take the initiative, show a deep commitment to your collective values, and possess the leadership qualities necessary to guide others.
So then, identifying these individuals involves looking beyond age or birth order to recognize who genuinely demonstrates these traits and how they can embody this crucial role.
That's why these individuals might be the niece who organizes family volunteering events, reflecting a commitment to community service, or the cousin who always steps up to mediate and resolve conflicts, showcasing leadership and a commitment to family unity.
Either way, identifying who will carry on your story involves more intention because recognizing potential torchbearers is a nuanced process.
Indeed, it's about observing not just what family members say but what they do, how they act in family and external activities, and how they lead by example.
Preparing for Responsibility
Now, once you've identified your torchbearer, this recognition shouldn't result in a formal coronation but a natural acknowledgment of their roles and contributions to the family.
Indeed, it's about highlighting the values and behaviors that led you to choose this individual in the first place, while enabling the rest of the family to see how this individual exemplifies and supports the family's overall vision, mission, and values.
At the same time, celebrating these qualities and actions publicly within your family encourages these behaviors and signals to others the value placed on leadership and service to the family's legacy.
Now, supporting your identified torchbearers is crucial for their development and continuing your legacy.
You can't just tell them how great they are and expect them to perpetuate your family's story.
They need ongoing support.
Now, this support can take many forms, from targeted education opportunities that align with their interests and the family's values to leadership roles within family enterprises or philanthropic efforts.
And so, how does this work?
Well, if a family member shows a keen interest in the arts and your family values cultural contributions, then supporting their education in art history or museum studies and involving them in the family's art foundation could be a way to nurture their passion and align it with the family legacy.
Mentorship is another way to support your family's up-and-coming torchbearer and plays a key role in preparing torchbearers for their responsibilities.
That's why pairing them with seasoned family members or even external mentors who can share wisdom, experiences, and guidance is crucial to their long-term development.
Now, this mentorship should ideally be structured like a coaching relationship. One that's built on a two-way exchange where questions are encouraged and learning is mutual.
This approach ensures that you have full buy-in from your chosen leader, and allows you to optimize your approach when viewed with a fresh set of eyes.
Either way, by identifying and supporting your family's torchbearers, you're not just preparing individuals to carry on a legacy, you're ensuring that the family's future leaders are ready and able to navigate the challenges and opportunities ahead.
It's a step that reinforces the importance of individual contribution within the context of the family's collective mission, ensuring that the torch of your family's legacy burns brightly for generations to come.
Keeping the Torch Lit
Alright, so we discussed why it's crucial to build your family's story around values that you want to pass along and how a torchbearer can be crucial to this end.
But the next big question here is, "Who will train the trainers?"
To be sure, it's one thing as a first-gen wealth builder to raise up your torchbearer to carry along your family's story.
And it's another to ensure that future generations will continue the same process and keep your family's torch lit.
That's why training the next generation of torchbearers is a dynamic process and one that ensures the continuity and growth of your family's legacy.
Indeed, it's about creating a culture of teaching by actively engaging younger family members, immersing them in the family's core values, and equipping them with the skills and knowledge they need to thrive as future leaders.
So then, assuming that you already have your torchbearer identified, how do you go about creating a teaching culture?
Engaging with the Rising Generation
Well, you can start by creating opportunities for the younger generation to deeply connect with the family's core values and legacy.
This engagement should be interactive and meaningful, and allow them to experience firsthand the impact of these values in action.
For instance, you can involve them in family philanthropy projects that align with your values, or include them in discussions about the family business, highlighting how these ventures reflect the family's mission.
This hands-on approach not only strengthens their understanding of the family's values but also fosters a sense of responsibility and pride in carrying these forward.
And the best thing is that you can start this process early because the work is about exposing family members to your family's values in living action and allowing them to learn through osmosis, at least initially.
Development Programs
Now, as children in the family get older, you'll likely want to consider developing formal training programs tailored to your family's legacy, to help build their skills and knowledge in being potential torchbearers.
Now, this approach could include workshops on financial literacy, leadership retreats, or internships within the family business.
And the goal here is to provide a structured yet flexible learning environment that caters to their interests and developmental needs.
For example, if your family values environmental stewardship, a summer internship with a green technology firm could provide practical experience and inspire innovative thinking about how to integrate these values into the family's investments and philanthropic efforts.
Mentorship and Transition
Here again, mentorship is also crucial in the training process, and serves as a bridge between generations.
That's why it's crucial to establish structured mentorship relationships that pair potential torchbearers in gen-three, gen-four and so on with contemporaneous leaders who exemplify the family's values and have successfully navigated the challenges of stewarding the family's legacy.
This mentorship approach can also facilitate a smoother transition of roles, and ensure that when the time comes, the next generation is prepared not just to take the reins but to lead with vision and purpose.
It's about passing on not just the tools for success but the wisdom to use them wisely, ensuring that your family's legacy continues to evolve and flourish in the hands of each new generation of torchbearers.
Indeed, by engaging, educating, and empowering the next generation in this way, you do more than prepare them to inherit a legacy, you're inspiring them to become conscientious custodians of a rich heritage that transcends financial wealth, imbuing them with the values, skills, and vision to lead your family into the future with confidence and integrity.
Torchbearers: Raising Kids Who Care About Your Legacy
You know, when it comes down to it, crafting a legacy is more than a testament to one's achievements, it's a deliberate and thoughtful process that ensures your family's values, stories, and aspirations are preserved and passed down through generations.
That's why, if you're in the throes of building first-generation wealth, this work is not merely about financial success but about embedding a culture of values, leadership, and legacy within your family that lasts for generations to come.
It's about identifying those who will carry the torch of your family's legacy, supporting them, and ensuring the continuity of your family's story in a way that resonates with both the present and future generations.
Indeed, the essence of your legacy lies in the impact it has on the lives it touches and the future paths it paves.
It's about making intentional choices now that will empower your children and their children after them to build upon the foundation you've laid, guided by the principles and values that define your family's identity, and, ultimately, help future generations become the masters of their own financial independence journey.
How to Pass on a Healthy Money Mindset Legacy
Many well-meaning parents want to raise children with wise money habits.
Who doesn't want their kids to be good financial stewards, right?
Well, what some end up doing, however, is unknowingly passing along money beliefs that limit their children financially, often for far too long than necessary.
Indeed, some parents may unintentionally transfer their own financial anxieties and insecurities to their children, perpetuating a generational cycle of financial fear and avoidance where children grow up feeling anxious about money because they've absorbed their parents' fears.
And so, what tends to happen then is that children raised with a limiting financial mindset end up lacking the confidence to make informed financial decisions.
That's because these individuals may either become overly conservative, missing out on beneficial financial opportunities, or too reckless with their savings because they don't understand the value of prudent financial planning.
Ultimately, if children don't learn to manage money wisely, building and maintaining generational wealth becomes challenging.
That's because, without the ability to navigate investing, save intelligently, and spend judiciously, you're going to face an uphill battle when it comes to passing along your financial legacy.
So then, what can you do to ensure that you're not passing along limiting money beliefs to your kids?
Well, you can start by first taking some time for introspection and getting to know your own money scripts, or money belief system. Then, you'll want to make a conscious effort to move beyond your own limiting beliefs by cultivating a growth mindset and then, most importantly, sharing what you've learned with your family and involving them in your wealth-building process.
Indeed, by uncovering your own money beliefs and shifting towards a growth mindset, what you're doing is not only reducing the chance of transmitting limiting money beliefs to your kids, you'll also pave the way for them to make smarter financial decisions and share those new habits with their own children.
Recognize and Understand Your Money Scripts
So then, at the core of first-gen wealth building lies a critical yet often overlooked challenge, and that's identifying and challenging limiting money beliefs.
And so to start, you're likely asking, "what is a money script?"
Definition and Origin
Well, the idea of money scripts is a concept introduced by financial psychologist Brad Klontz.
And based on his own professional experience and observation, what he's trying to describe are the subconscious beliefs about money that shape our financial perspectives and the way we behave with money.
Now, more often than not, these scripts are typically formed in childhood, and rooted in our earliest observations and experiences related to money within our family and societal context.
Whether it's the belief that "money is the root of all evil," "you have to work hard to get wealthy," or "money doesn't buy happiness," these scripts play a pivotal role in our financial lives, often without your conscious awareness.
If you think about it long enough, you could probably identify some unique situation or experience in your family of origin that defined how you act around money today.
Identification
Indeed, identifying your own limiting money beliefs is the first crucial step toward overcoming them, and ensuring that you don't pass them down to your kids.
Now, this process involves introspection and reflection on your financial decisions and understanding the emotions tied to those decisions.
How so?
Well, consider moments when you've felt anxious about spending or investing, or times when you've avoided financial planning altogether.
At the time, it might have felt like simple procrastination or analysis paralysis.
Nevertheless, these reactions can be clues to underlying, subcoscious money scripts borne in childhood that are guiding your behavior today.
For example, if you find yourself hesitating to invest in the stock market, even though, logically, you know its potential for long-term growth, then you could be holding on to a deep-seated belief that investing is too risky, which is reflective of a script that can hinder wealth accumulation.
Impact Analysis
To be sure, the impact of these limiting beliefs on not just your personal wealth, but also your family wealth dynamics can't be overstated.
And that's why, As James E. Hughes Jr. points out, these scripts not only affect how individuals manage their own finances but also how they communicate about money within the family, potentially perpetuating harmful financial behaviors across generations.
How so?
Well, a parent who subconsciously believes that talking about money is taboo may fail to educate their children about financial literacy, leaving them ill-prepared to manage or grow family wealth in the future.
That's why recognizing and understanding your money scripts is a vital first step in breaking free from the cycle of limiting financial beliefs.
So then, by bringing these subconscious beliefs to light, you can begin the process of challenging and transforming them, setting the stage for more empowered financial decisions that pave the way for generational wealth and prosperity.
And this journey of financial self-awareness is not just about enhancing your own money management skills, it's about ensuring that your legacy, one that's full of knowledge, empowerment, and financial well-being, can be passed on to future generations.
Break the Cycle and Cultivate a Growth Mindset
Alright, so once you've identified your money script and the impact that it's having on your family, the next step is to create a new set of beliefs that align with where you want your family to go.
Now, it's often easier to say what you want to do than actually doing it. That's why, to bring these new beliefs to reality, you'll also need to cultivate a growth mindset.
Indeed, breaking the cycle of limiting money beliefs and cultivating a growth mindset is a transformative first step towards personal financial success and the fostering of generational wealth.
Now, this transformative phase is about challenging those deep-seated scripts that have governed your financial decisions and behaviors for so long, and reshaping them into empowering beliefs that open the door to wealth and prosperity.
You're not eliminating or erasing these beliefs, but editing them and rewriting them to suit the lifestyle you've envisioned for yourself and your family.
Challenging Limiting Beliefs
So then, where do you start?
Well, the journey begins by confronting your limiting money scripts head-on.
Indeed, as Klontz points out in his book, "Wired for Wealth," you can start by questioning the validity of these beliefs and evaluating whether they're truly reflective of your reality, or whether they're echoes of past circumstances.
Now, this questioning approach is so crucial because it can often unravel some loosely held, yet still detrimental scripts, allowing you to see them for what they are: outdated narratives that no longer serve you well.
For example, if you've been held back by the belief that "you have to work hard to get wealthy," and have given yourself time to enjoy your family or your wealth, then you can challenge this belief by defining your own measure of "enough", and considering investment opportunities that can grow your wealth without the constant need to exchange your time for money.
Here, it's about recognizing that while hard work is valuable, defining your own level of satisfaction and evaluating smart financial strategies can also lead to prosperity.
Growth Mindset Development
The next thing you'll want to do is to cultivate a growth mindset.
Now, cultivating a growth mindset towards wealth means embracing the idea that your financial capabilities are not fixed but can be developed through dedication and learning.
It's seeing mistakes not as failures but as valuable learning opportunities.
Indeed, what this approach is ultimately about is fostering a healthy mental lifestyle.
You can think about it as if you've decided to train for a marathon.
Simply going to the gym a few times a week or getting in a few 5Ks per month isn't going to cut it.
If you're going to accomplish this feat, you'll need to consider how you're sleeping, your rest cycle, how often you're training, and so forth.
Your entire health lifestyle shifts to accommodate this new goal.
In a similar way, developing a growth mindset to challenge limiting money beliefs includes developing an approach that values perseverance, adaptability, and the continuous pursuit of knowledge.
Practical Application
And so, how do you go about doing this work?
Well, to start, it's essential to acknowledge these limiting beliefs as they come up, just as you would when overhearing a familiar but outdated song in your mind.
You can recognize it, yet don't feel compelled to accept them as truths.
What you need to do is challenge these beliefs by questioning their validity, and you can do this by asking yourself whether they are indeed accurate reflections of your capabilities or simply echoes of past constraints.
Now, this process isn't about dismissing your experiences but rather considering new financial possibilities. It's by going back to the start of those limiting beliefs and identifying ways to reimagine them to suit your current life and family goals.
Then what you'll want to do is leverage your inherent love for learning and self-improvement and apply this enthusiasm towards enhancing your financial literacy.
This could involve exploring resources like books, podcasts, or seminars that broaden your understanding of managing your money.
You can also try engaging with the narratives of individuals who have successfully navigated financial transformations. Try on their experiences, walk a mile in their shoes, and learn if their approach could help you as well.
This isn't approach isn't just about accumulating knowledge, it's about exposing yourself to diverse financial philosophies and recognizing the breadth of options you have available to you.
Finally, embrace the concept of small wins and experimentation.
Now, chances are that you're likely in a unique position where you can afford to take some calculated risks.
Try out new investment strategies on a small scale, or allocate a portion of your wealth to support causes you care about, and observe what you learn from these experiences.
It's like training for a marathon: you don't start by running the full distance on day one.
You build up to it, learning and adjusting your strategy as you go.
Celebrate each success, no matter how minor it may seem, and use setbacks as learning opportunities, not evidence of failure.
Educate and Involve Your Family in Wealth Building
Alright, so we've talked about identifying limiting money scripts and developing a growth mindset to move beyond them.
The next thing you'll want to do to ensure that you're setting the stage for your children to develop healthy money habits is to teach your children what you've learned.
And why would you want to do this?
Well, teaching what you've learned is crucial for breaking limiting money beliefs and nurturing a growth mindset because it reinforces your understanding and challenges you to clarify your thoughts.
Indeed, as you explain your financial insights to others, you deepen your own grasp and commitment to these ideas and distance yourself from outdated beliefs.
In fact, the act of sharing fosters a cycle of continuous learning and self-improvement, making you both a learner and a mentor and propelling you further away from those limiting scripts.
At the same time, educating and involving your family in wealth-building marks a pivotal step towards not only managing your money effectively but also ensuring its growth and sustainability across generations.
Family Financial Education
So then, when it comes to sharing your knowledge with your family, you can start by integrating financial education into your family's weekly and monthly routine.
The objective here is to demystify money matters and make financial discussions a regular part of your family's life.
Now, you can start this knowledge sharing with basic concepts like earning, saving, and spending for younger members and gradually introduce more complex topics like investing, taxes, and estate planning as they grow.
Either way, what you'll want to do is ensure that the tools and resources you discuss are tailored to different age groups so you can make learning engaging and relevant and set a solid foundation for engagement.
Wealth Transfer Planning
Then, as you've moved through the basics of money management and have a solid process in place for transferring knowledge, you can begin incorporating weightier topics like wealth transfers to ensure a solid base for legacy building.
Now, involving your family in wealth transfer planning discussions is crucial for preparing them to manage and preserve your family's wealth for generations to come.
This could include conversations about estate planning, philanthropy, and legacy preservation.
And so, by making these discussions inclusive and starting early, what you're doing is ensuring that your wealth transfer aligns with your family's values and goals and that each member understands their role in the continuity of the family's financial legacy.
For example, discussing the creation of a family foundation can be a way to involve everyone in philanthropy because it allows each member to contribute to decisions about charitable giving.
This approach not only helps in passing on financial wealth but also instills a sense of purpose and responsibility towards the wider community.
Modeling Positive Financial Behaviors
Finally, it's one thing to tell your family to do as you say. And it's another for them to do as you do.
That's why, as a parent or guardian, modeling positive financial behaviors is perhaps the most influential tool in your arsenal for instilling a healthy financial mindset in your children.
And what does this look like?
Well, this means making transparent financial decisions, openly discussing financial successes and setbacks, and showing how challenges can be navigated through informed decision-making and resilience.
At the same time, encouraging open communication about money removes the taboo surrounding financial discussions, making it easier for family members to express their views, ask questions, and share their aspirations.
Indeed, educating and involving your family in wealth building is a transformative step that not only enhances your family's financial literacy and preparedness but also cements a legacy of shared values, collective responsibility, and enduring prosperity.
So then, by taking proactive steps to educate, plan, and model positive behaviors, what you're doing is laying the groundwork for a future where your family's wealth is not just preserved but flourishes and, more importantly, is supported by a foundation of knowledge, unity, and purpose.
How to Pass on a Legacy of a Healthy Money Mindset
When it comes down to it, it's clear that the desire to raise children who are wise with money is a noble and common goal among many parents.
Nevertheless, this outcome requires introspection to ensure that we don't pass onto our children our own belief systems that limit their financial abilities.
Indeed, the journey from recognizing and understanding your own limiting money beliefs to breaking these cycles and cultivating a growth mindset is no small feat.
It requires reflection, dedication, and a willingness to embrace change, not just for yourself but for the sake of your children and the generations that follow.
Remember, educating your children about money, involving them in the wealth-building process, and modeling positive financial behaviors are not just strategies, they are gifts you're giving that pay dividends for generations to come.
Indeed, these gifts equip your children with the knowledge, skills, and mindset necessary to make informed financial decisions, manage wealth wisely, and, importantly, become the masters of their own financial independence journey.
Having the Talk: Kids and Money
Opening up and starting conversations about how to handle money and finances with your kids may seem overwhelming, but it doesn’t have to be. As a parent, it is your role to serve as a positive influence in their lives to get them on the right financial track. Here are five things to consider as you embark on helping your children understand the importance of being responsible with their finances.
Start Simply, When They Are Young
Start discussing money with even the littlest ones by including by including them in everyday activities, such as grocery shopping or budgeting. This allows money to become a tangible concept and not some abstract thing that they cannot see. You can also ask them questions such as "We have 5 dollars to buy a treat, would you pick ice cream or cookies?". These types of conversations help children to understand that their are trade-offs to any decision, and that money is not infinite.
Be Truthful
Being honest with your kids is a great first step to opening the door to discussing finances. You can share the family budget for items like groceries or entertainment, and explain remind them of this limit when they ask for items that don't fit within it.
Additionally, If there are things in your financial past, such as going into debt, that you are not proud of, share that with your kids. Honest moments with your kids are very valuable and will help build trust. Keep in mind that the more open and honest you are with your kids, the more open they will be with you, so being truthful about your own finances is a great place to start.
Talk About Values
Encourage your kids to consider what is important to them for their future. Start by asking questions such as "Do you want to own a house or rent when you grow up? or "What splurges would you like to be able to make when you grow up (travel, cars, etc)?".
Helping kids to visualize what they want for the future is a crucial component to talking to kids about money and financial goals. Talking about what they value and hope to have in their future allows them to take a long-term view, which is critical to the concepts of saving, budgeting, and paying down debts.
Establish Family Goals
As a family, talk about your budgeting methods and set specific goals together. For instance, perhaps you set a weekly grocery limit of $150. Take your children to the store with you when you shop and have them help look for sales or clip coupons to keep your cart under budget. Involving your children however you can with the family finances is a great hands-on way to educate them and give them a chance to see real-life examples of how their financial habits will impact them in the future.
Lead By Example
There may be certain financial topics that you are not as knowledgeable about, and that’s okay! Take the opportunity to learn with your kids. Showing your kids that you are interested in growing your understanding of financial topics will heighten their interest in it as well.
Talking to your kids about money may seem like a daunting conversation to have if you don’t know how to approach it properly. However, broaching the subject sooner rather than later will reap many benefits for you and your kids. Ultimately, you want your kids to have the knowledge and skills they need to handle their own finances responsibly as they grow up. As a parent, it’s your job to instill this knowledge in them and to open the door to an often taboo subject so that you can help them get off on the right foot with their finances. Financial habits are formed young, so it’s critical that you start early and start the conversation today. Make your kids feel comfortable to talk about finances with you by using these tips.
The Family that Plans Together Stays Together
Some say that the family that plays together stays together.
And the simple reason this saying holds true is because unstructured time well-spent together creates stronger social and emotional ties within the family unit.
You're literally bonding together.
Now, when it comes to talking about money, some families find the opposite to be true.
That's because discussions around money often repel members.
And so, the more you try to talk about money, especially how it's supposed to be used, the greater the tension that are likely to arise.
But here's the rub: most individuals know that achieving life and financial goals often requires planning for the future.
This work involves starting with the end in mind, identifying the resources you have today, and then creating a strategy for bridging the gap between where you're at today, and where you want to be in the future.
It's simple, right?
Well, sure, this approach to planning is simple, but it's not easy.
This is especially true when you're trying to get your family’s spending and savings habits on the same page.
That's because it's one thing to plan for a singular vision for your life or your life with your partner. And it's another to agree on a plan that your kids or other family members can buy into.
So then, what can you do to create a financial framework for your wealth that involves your family and helps you achieve your broader legacy goals while improving your family’s togetherness?
Well, you can start by creating a unified family wealth strategy.
This approach involves creating a shared family vision for your wealth, identifying easy-to-achieve goals that your family can rally around, and developing principles to foster effective communication to ensure everyone's voice is heard.
Establishing a Shared Values System
Alright, now, when it comes to creating a unified family wealth strategy, especially if you’re a first-generation wealth builder, you need more than just sharing what you know when it comes to talking to your family about money.
You need a common money language.
In other words, for your family to get on the same page when it comes to money, you need a singular reference point to ensure that you're all singing from the same hymnal.
And so, that's where establishing a shared values system comes into play.
Indeed, this approach allows your family's money decisions to be filtered through the same lens and ensures that every financial decision reflects your family's core principles.
Defining Family Values
So then, where do you start?
Well, the process begins with first defining your family's values.
Now, this is a topic that we've written about in the past, so be sure to check out our recent resources.
Either way, to facilitate this first step and actually identify your family values, you can utilize exercises and workshops designed to help your family articulate and align its values.
Now, these approaches can be as simple as discussing what values each family member believes are collectively important, to something more structured like a workshop with a professional facilitator.
Either way, the key here is to ensure that every family member's voice is heard and that the values chosen truly reflects the collective goals of the family.
And if you're still not sure where to start, James Clear in his book, "Atomic Habits" has some great exercises to choose from.
You can also visit one of my favorite tools, the life values inventory online, available at lifevaluesinventory.org to get started.
Either way, by clearly defining and integrating your family's values into your financial planning approach, what you’re doing is ensuring that the way you and your family talk about money isn’t just about growing assets but about building a legacy that reflects what's truly important to you collectively.
Doing so not only aligns your financial decisions with your ethical and moral beliefs, it also strengthens your family's bonds by uniting everyone behind a common purpose.
Crafting a Family Financial Plan
Alright, now after establishing a shared values system with y our family, the next crucial step in creating a unified family wealth strategy, and finding harmony when it comes to talking to your family about money is crafting a financial plan that aligns with your family's values.
Now, earlier you heard that the family that plays together, stays together.
Well, when it comes to money, the truth is that the family that plans together, stays together.
You see, it’s one thing to create a vision for where you should go.
It’s another to execute on that vision, and move your family, collectively, toward that purpose.
And that’s where a family financial plan comes into play.
And why’s that?
That's because a financial plan serves as a roadmap to guide your family towards achieving its financial goals, all while staying true to its core values and principles.
Setting Collective Goals
So then, where do you begin?
Well, you can start by setting clear, collective financial goals for the next year, five years, twenty years, and 100 years.
Get your family to think big!
This process involves a collaborative discussion where each family member shares their personal goals, and together, you identify common objectives that align with your collective values.
Whether it's saving for your kids' education expenses, planning for family vacations, imagining what your retirement will look like for your family, or setting aside funds to support the learning goals of generations down the road, these goals should reflect your family's shared values.
Setting Tangible Financial Milestones
Now, once you've set your shared values and goals, it's time to bring them to life with some real, hard timelines you can get behind.
You can think of these as your family's financial milestones.
Now, the beauty of setting these firm, hard dates is that they give you something tangible to work towards, and it motivates everyone in the family to stay on track.
So, how do we get there?
Well, imagine you've decided to fully fund your great grandchildren’s education so that they don’t have to lean on student loans.
It's a big goal, right?
Well sure, it might be, but we can simplify it by breaking down the goal, starting with a date.
For example, let’s say that you want to have a million dollars saved in an educational trust by 2070.
This means that your family will need to figure out how much to set aside each month starting today, and stay committed to that savings goal as a family until your milestone is reached.
Indeed, having a big, tangible savings goal like setting money aside for future generations and benefits the entire family can help get everyone get energized and on the same page.
In some ways, it forces each family member to consider their own money habits, and how they either help or hinder the family's broader, collective goal.
Fostering Effective Family Communication
Alright, so once you've identified your family's values, and set the stage for a broader financial plan, the next step in creating a cohesive family wealth system is to foster healthier communication between each member in your family.
And so, what does communication have to do with money?
Well, we touched on this earlier, and this step is crucial because, without effective communication, you can't achieve your collective goals.
If you don’t know where you’re going, any road will get you there.
It's that essential.
That's why, with open and regular communication, what you’re doing is ensuring that everyone in your family is on the same page, understands the financial approaches being utilized, and enables everyone to feel engaged in the decision-making process.
Organizing Family Meetings
And so, where do you start?
Well, you can start by establishing a regular schedule for family meetings that are dedicated to talking about money.
Now, these meetings should be structured to allow each family member, regardless of age, their own opportunity to voice their opinions, ask questions, and contribute ideas to your shared family vision.
This could start as quarterly meetings where you review financial goals, discuss any changes in circumstances, track spending, and evaluate your progress towards achieving your family's goals.
For example, your family could use these meetings to discuss the performance of your investment portfolio, talk about philanthropic giving, or consider spending or savings adjustments to meet your education funding goals.
Know Your Audience
Now, it's one thing to get together to talk about money.
It's another to hold a meeting where everyone feels like they took something away from it.
That's why it's essential that your money-related matters be presented in a way that is understandable to all members, especially to the younger ones.
Indeed, these meetings should be used as opportunities to indirectly educate your family about financial principles, investment strategies, and the importance of budgeting and saving.
This approach not only helps in building financial literacy across the family but also ensures that everyone understands the family's approach to money and their individual roles in achieving the collective’s goals.
Succession Planning
Finally, when it comes to fostering healthy communication about money, you'll want to take the time to discuss succession planning.
Now, few people enjoy talking about their potential untimely demise.
Even so, by incorporating discussions on succession planning and wealth transfer into family meetings, you're normalizing an otherwise uncomfortable topic and showing your family that you care enough not to burden them with indecision at a vulnerable time in their lives.
And so, what does this approach look like?
Well, these sorts of discussions involve explaining the structures put in place to address the family's financial needs after you're gone, like trusts and wills, and how they reflect the family's values and goals.
Now, here again, these sorts of discussions are crucial for preparing the next generation for their future roles and responsibilities in managing your family’s wealth.
That's because, during these conversations, you could explain the purpose of a family trust to your children, outlining how it operates, its benefits, and how it will support your family's values and goals over the long term.
Either way, effective family communication about money matters fosters a culture of openness, trust, and collective responsibility.
And so, by organizing regular family meetings, fostering transparency, and focusing on education and succession planning, you're creating a strong foundation for your family's financial future.
The Family that Plans Together Stays Together
When it comes down to it, bringing your family together around money can seem daunting at first, but it's undoubtedly achievable with the right approach.
That's why by establishing shared values, creating a cohesive family financial plan, and ensuring ongoing, open communication, you're not just creating a plan for your money, you're laying the foundation for your legacy.
And this legacy is underpinned by shared goals, values, and a collective vision that transcends mere numbers on a balance sheet. It's about creating a bond that fortifies your family against the strains and uncertainties that money-related matters can sometimes bring.
Remember, the simple act of coming together, setting shared goals, and openly discussing money can transform the way your family views wealth.
It's not just about ensuring financial stability for future generations; it's about using wealth as a tool to reinforce your family's values, support each other's goals, and make a meaningful impact in your community.
And the beauty of this process is that it not only brings your family closer together, it also empowers each member to take one step closer to becoming the master of their own financial independence journey.
Beyond 529 Plans: Unlocking the Potential of Educational Trusts
Is educating your children, grandchildren, or other important individuals in your life a priority?
Well, for many of us, the answer might be a resounding "yes."
And so, you've likely thought of ways to support the learning efforts of your loved ones, including funding their education expenses.
Now, when it comes to setting aside money for education expenses, you might think of traditional savings vehicles like a 529 plan, a Coverdell, or UTMA.
But the trouble is that once the money leaves your hands, you have no control over its use.
To be sure, while each of these vehicles has its own merit, ultimately, they have restrictions regarding the amount of control and discretion you have over the gift you make.
So then, how can you support your family's future learning while maintaining some control over how the money is used?
That's where educational trusts come into play.
You see, an educational trust is specifically tailored to ensure that your gift is used exclusively for educational purposes, from private schooling and college tuition to enriching experiences like studying abroad.
At the same time, it's more than just a savings vehicle because by establishing an educational trust, you're sending a powerful message about how crucial it is to foster intellectual understanding, opportunities, and growth in your family for generations to come.
Educational Trust is More than a Savings Fund
Alright, so what exactly is an educational trust?
Well, you can think of an educational trust as a dedicated financial guardian for your loved one's educational journey.
Now, you'll likely recall that a trust is a legal arrangement where you hand over control of your assets (like money, property, or investments) to someone you trust (this person is called the trustee).
And the reason you do this is for the benefit of other people, who are called beneficiaries.
So then, when you set up a trust, it's like giving a responsible friend or family member control of your savings account.
Now, you set rules for how and when your friend can use the money to help your family or kids.
But it's the trustee's job to manage the assets in a way that follows your instructions and is in the best interest of the beneficiaries.
Now, unlike a general trust, which can be set up for a variety of reasons, an educational trust has one primary focus: to ensure that money that goes into the trust is available and used exclusively for educational expenses.
And this outcome could range from paying tuition fees for private schooling to covering college expenses and even extending to other educational experiences that foster learning, like paying for study abroad programs.
Now, how might this savings approach be different from other kinds of trusts you might be familiar with?
Well, the key lies in its specificity and control.
You see, while a general trust might provide broad financial support for beneficiaries for various needs like living expenses, healthcare, or even leisure, an educational trust puts, you guessed it, education at the forefront.
This means that when you set up an educational you can rest assured knowing that the wealth you've worked hard to accumulate won't be diluted by expenses outside the scope of educating your loved ones.
How so?
Well, that's because when you set up this specialized trust, you have the power to define the terms, like whether you want the trust to cover specific costs until a certain age or a degree is achieved and even include provisions for covering costs of miscellaneous educational materials and extracurricular activities.
Either way, an educational trust isn't just a financial savings vehicle, it's a testament to your enduring values because it sends a clear message to your family about the importance you place on learning as a cornerstone for personal growth and success.
Educational Trusts for Non-Traditional Endeavors
Alright, now that we've covered the basics of an educational trust, let's talk about how to use an educational trust to fund non-traditional learning goals.
Now, you're likely familiar with how you can use education savings vehicles like a 529 plan to pay for college tuition and some education expenses.
The beauty of an educational trust is that you can use the funds to pay for expenses that educate your loved ones, but these expenses don't necessarily relate to a traditional college experience.
To be sure, traditional paths, like attending a four-year university, aren't the only routes to your family's success and personal fulfillment.
How so?
Well, that's because an educational trust can be used as a dynamic resource for your grandchildren, whether they choose to walk the conventional academic path or embark on unique learning experiences.
For example, if your children or grandchildren dream of studying abroad so they can explore different cultures and gain global perspectives, then these aspirations likely won't be covered by a traditional 529 plan.
Nevertheless, in this case, your trust can be the financial backbone to cover the costs of these expenses like paying for international tuition, travel, and living costs abroad.
At the same time, funds in an educational trust can be used to support the value of real-world experience through internships or apprenticeships.
And why would you want to cover such spending?
Well, the truth is that these opportunities often provide practical skills and networking advantages that traditional classrooms just can't offer.
And while some employers are getting better about paying a fair income for apprenticeships, the trust can be used to cover living experiences so family members can focus on learning instead of surviving.
Indeed, this way you can rest assured that your educational trust can be structured to support enriching experiences, ensuring your grandchildren and generations down the road have the financial means to pursue internships, whether they're paid or unpaid, in various fields of interest.
At the same time, the trust can extend to support other forms of education, like vocational training, online courses, or even entrepreneurial ventures.
Now, this flexibility is especially relevant in today's fast-paced, technology-driven world, where new educational platforms and career paths are continually evolving and changing.
That's why, by setting up your trust to encompass all these possibilities, you're not just funding education, you're investing in your family's ability to adapt, grow, and succeed in a world where the only constant is change.
Determining Whether an Education Trust is Right for You
Alright, so now that we've talked about what an educational trust is, and how you can use it to maintain control over your funding goals and support non-traditional experiences, let's talk about how to determine whether an education trust is right for you.
Now, when it comes to legacy building and ensuring a prosperous future for your heirs, an educational trust can be a powerful tool in your estate planning arsenal.
So then, where do you start?
Well, let's first talk about control.
Now, as you'll likely recall, an educational trust gives you unparalleled control over how your wealth is allocated for educational purposes.
That's because you're not just giving money away for education, you're also establishing guidelines in your trust for how it's used to further a specific learning goal.
This means that you can specify what educational expenses are covered, like tuition fees, books, or even living costs while studying.
And, you can also determine when the funds are disbursed, which ensures that they're available at the most crucial points in your beneficiaries' educational journeys.
Now, the next thing you'll want to consider is whether you want to use your trust to create a multi-generational educational impact.
If so, an educational trust might be the right option for you.
That's because a single trust entity can be structured to benefit not just your children or grandchildren, but multiple generations down the road.
And ultimately, it's an enduring testament to your commitment to education, stretching into near-perpetuity so that each generation can benefit from the foresight you've shown today, and reap the rewards of a well-planned educational trust tomorrow.
Now, the beauty of this approach is in its scalability and adaptability.
That's because you can set up the trust to accommodate changes in your family, whether that means adding beneficiaries as your family grows or adjusting to the evolving educational landscape.
And since you're someone who likes to see the details, you'll likely appreciate that this trust can be tailored to match your specific intentions and financial situation.
Finally, an educational trust is not just a tool for your immediate family.
Indeed, when it's set up the right way, you can extend its benefits to supporting children outside of your family, whether that’s in your community or beyond.
How so?
Well, here's how it works: by creating the trust, you're essentially setting aside money or assets specifically for the purpose of helping local children with their learning needs.
And why would you want to do this?
Well, maybe you've noticed that some children in your community struggle with paying tuition fees, or maybe you want to encourage them to pursue subjects they're passionate about, but they otherwise can’t get funding for.
Either way, you can use this tool as a means to making an impact in your community that goes beyond your family.
Indeed, by setting up an educational trust, you're not just giving a one-time donation, you're establishing a lasting resource that can support students for years, even generations to come.
And such a trust could provide scholarships, fund school programs, or even help with basic needs like buying books and supplies.
Either way, this approach is a way to make a real, tangible difference in the lives of those in your community and beyond.
At the same time, there's this sense of personal fulfillment and community connection you get, knowing you're actively contributing to the future of the place you call home.
Beyond 529 Plans: Unlocking the Potential of Educational Trusts
When it comes down to it, the decision to set up an educational trust reflects a deep commitment to the intellectual growth and academic success of your loved ones and those in your community.
Now, unlike other savings options, an educational trust offers a unique blend of control, flexibility, and purpose.
That's because it's not just about securing funds for education, it's about shaping a legacy of learning and opportunity that can span generations.
So then, as you weigh your options for supporting educational goals for your family and community, consider the long-term impact of an educational trust.
It's an impact that goes beyond mere financial assistance and is a statement about the values you hold dear and the future you envision for your family.
At the same time, an educational trust ensures that your investment in learning is protected and directed exactly where you intend to build a foundation of knowledge, experience, and wisdom.
Ultimately, by choosing the path of an educational trust, you're not just contributing to the immediate educational needs of your loved ones, you're also helping them pursue their happiness and take one step closer to becoming the masters of their own financial independence journey.
Print Money from Your Family Tree with a Family Charter
Under the right conditions, money does grow on trees.
You heard that right.
And to be clear, money can only grow on trees when it grows from a family tree.
How so?
Well, when each successive generation in a family tree works together, they can produce a varying measure of wealth that benefits each family member and their broader community.
And so, what's the catch?
Well, the catch is that wealth produced by your family doesn't just happen on its own because it's cultivated with intention and forethought.
Indeed, this work involves deliberate planning that defines your family's purpose, lays out how your family will address conflicts and repair ruptures, and ultimately defines how your family will respond to inevitable life changes.
And so, how do you go about creating a plan to grow a family tree that produces fruit for generations to come?
Well, you can start by creating a family charter first, then focusing on the money.
You see, it's one thing to simply gather financial assets. And it's another to cultivate an environment where your family is willing to cooperate and work together to wisely steward those financial resources and raise up a tree that bears fruit for generations to come.
To be sure, whether you have young kids at home, your children are grown and out of the house, or your family involves your community of friends, creating a family charter, or often referred to as a family constitution or family compact, can help ensure that your family tree eventually prints cash to benefit your family and community for future generations.
Identify Your Family’s Purpose and Direction
Alright, so where do you start when it comes to putting together a family charter?
Well, regardless of where you're at in your money story, you can start by getting crystal clear about your family's purpose and direction.
Certainly, your charter will ultimately reflect the complexity of your financial situation and your current family dynamic.
But to get this process up and off the ground, you'll want to start with the basics.
And so, what are we talking about here when it comes to your family purpose?
Well, in the context of a family charter, your family's purpose refers to the underlying reason for your family's collective existence beyond just your shared genetics or legal ties.
It's about defining what your family stands for now, what you want your legacy to be, and what contributions your family could make in your community and more broadly in the world.
So then, when your purpose is defined clearly, it becomes your vision that acts as a compass that guides your family's decisions, behaviors, and goals, and helps each family member understand the bigger impact of their actions and how they contribute to the family's overall mission.
And what about that direction we mentioned earlier?
Well, direction is about setting a clear path for achieving your family's vision or purpose.
It involves outlining specific goals, milestones, and strategies that align with the family's purpose.
And so defining your direction is crucial because it provides a sense of clarity and focus for everyone involved and ensures that all family members are working towards common objectives.
To be sure, James E. Hughes Jr., a proponent of family wealth and legacy planning, emphasizes in his work how a well-defined vision and direction in a family charter can foster a sense of unity and commitment among all family members.
Identifying Your Family's Purpose
So then, how do you go about identifying your family's purpose?
Well, this process begins with your family engaging in frank and inclusive conversations about what's important to you as a collective.
And what if your kids are too young to understand what we’re talking about when it comes to your family’s purpose?
Well, even if you're a first-generation wealth builder and your children are still young, it's essential to involve them in the work of building out your family's purpose.
That’s because, even at a young age, many children instinctively know what’s important to them about their family, and the kind of difference that their own family unit can make in the world.
Indeed, it's crucial that everyone is encouraged to share their goals, dreams, and ideas for the future no matter how out of left-field they’re ideas might seem.
At the same time, staying open-minded will ensure that your discussions are conducted in an environment of respect and openness, which allows all voices in your family to be heard and considered equally, no matter how silly they might sound.
To be sure, when everyone feels like they've contributed to this charter equally and have been heard fully, there's a higher chance of charter buy-in and active participation in the process going forward.
Either way, your task is to find common ground among each diverse viewpoint, which involves identifying shared values, goals, and aspirations that resonate with every member of your household or community.
Ultimately, your purpose, or what your family was put on earth to accomplish, should be defined in your charter in a way that achieves a delicate balance of honoring individual desires and the destination you’re moving toward as a collective that defines a unified vision that everyone can commit to.
And so, as you start to shape out this shared vision, your work should culminate in an articulated, clear, concise, and inspiring vision statement.
Now, this vision statement should be forward-looking, encapsulating not just where your family is today but where you aspire to be in the future.
This vision statement will be the benchmark against which everyone in the family measures their behaviors and choices.
And so, what does defining your purpose and creating your vision statement look like?
Well, this approach might include storytelling, where you recall past successes and challenges and how your family navigated them, to imagining future scenarios for your family by clearly describing where you're going and why.
Ultimately, focusing on the purpose and direction of your family charter by starting with your shared vision serves as the foundation upon which your family builds its identity and legacy.
Indeed, it lays the foundation for helping family members understand their roles within the larger family system, encouraging responsible stewardship of family assets, and fostering a culture of collaboration and mutual respect not just for today's household but for generations to come.
Use Your Charter to Communicate Better and Stay on Course
Alright, so we've discussed how your shared family vision can act as a benchmark to gauge your family's purpose and direction.
Now, let's talk about how you can use your charter to help your family stay on track when times get tough.
Indeed, a family charter, when used to create a compelling vision of the future, is all about getting each member on the same page but doing so in a way that invites everyone to participate.
In a similar way, when times get tough, a family charter becomes a vital tool for avoiding communication breakdowns and repairing relationship ruptures within your family.
How so?
Well, that's because, when approached the right way, the charter acts like a framework that defines guidelines for communication and interaction, especially when many family conflicts can lead to communication breakdowns and eventual ruptures.
And so, how do you go about incorporating these guidelines to support more effective communication?
Well, start by focusing on developing principles, instead of rules, to guide your family interactions.
And why guidelines over rules?
Well, you can think of rules like specific instructions that sometimes dictate what your family should or should not do in certain situations.
And this approach can often be seen as rigid and established by an authority that everyone else is expected to follow to a “T.”
So then, breaking a communication rule could result in a predefined consequence or punishment, and ultimately, further resistance from one or more family members.
Here again, rules can be rigid, so your family needs something more flexible if it’s going to work together for the long-haul.
And that’s where principles come in.
Now, principles are more like fundamental beliefs or philosophies that guide your family’s behavior and it decision-making process in a broader sense.
How so?
Well, rather than being the State Trooper ready to hand out speeding tickets to your family, principles offer more flexibility and grace during times of indiscretion.
Indeed, the way you interpret and apply principles is based on your family's shared understanding and judgment.
They tend to be more about moral or ethical standards, rather than specific black-and-white rules, or way of behaving that need to be followed.
That's why, while breaking a rule is often a clear-cut act, not adhering to a principle is more about straying from a personal or shared value system.
At the same time, principle-based guidelines can help you and your family members understand how to express yourselves effectively, and actually listen to each other when times get tough.
How so?
Well, during times of conflict or misunderstanding, your charter might offer a set of principles that encourage open and honest communication, and ensures that everyone feels heard and valued.
Here, it's about creating a safe environment where each family member can share their thoughts and feelings about a given disagreement without fear of judgment or reprisal.
At the same time, in situations where communication breakdowns do occur, the family charter serves as a reference point to realign and recalibrate your interactions.
It reminds you of the agreed-upon ways to address conflicts and misunderstandings, which could involve structured family meetings, mediation by a neutral family member, or even seeking external help when necessary.
The key here is that the charter provides a clear path to follow when navigating rough waters.
Keep Your Family Charter Updated with Life Changes
Alright, so now that you understand how a basic family charter can help you chart a course for your family and keep you on track, you're all set, right?
Well, the fact is that a family charter is rarely, if ever, a set-it-and-forget-it tool.
Indeed, as you move through the different stages of your family's life, and incorporate one generation to the next, it's essential to frequently review and update your family charter to ensure it remains relevant and reflective of your changing circumstances.
Indeed, just as your family grows and evolves, so too should your family charter.
And so, how do you go about doing this work?
Well, you can start by considering how life changes over the past year have affected your family overall. These could be major events like kids getting married, new family additions, and career changes or more subtle shifts in values, goals, and aspirations.
To be sure, each of these milestones or turning points can alter the dynamics of your family, and introduce new perspectives, responsibilities, and challenges that need to be addressed within your charter.
That's why, by reviewing and revisiting your family charter on the regular, you ensure that it adapts to these changes, and continues to serve as an effective guide for your family's interactions and decisions.
And so, how can you approach the review process?
Well, you can start by scheduling a dedicated time for your family to come together to review your existing charter, and kick the tires on its relevance.
Now, rather than scheduling this meeting in a formal setting, this meeting location should be set in a comfortable and neutral environment where everyone feels comfortable expressing themselves without fear of judgement.
Remember, the goal here is to have an open and honest discussion where everyone's input is valued and heard.
Then, as you're reviewing your existing family charter, take some time to reflect on each section of the charter and discuss how well it has served your family so far.
Ask, "does the vision and direction we've set still make sense for our family?" or "How well have the principles we've defined really helped during times of conflict?"
At the same time, encourage members to share their experiences and perspectives, such as what's worked well and what could be improved upon in the way that you’ve used the charter in the past year.
This reflection will help you identify what aspects of the charter are still relevant and which ones need to get with the times.
And here again, as you discuss the necessary updates, focus on how your family has evolved since your last review. More specifically, consider any significant family changes such as new member additions, shifts in family dynamics, or changes in collective goals and values.
Here again, the emphasis should be on aligning your updated charter with your family's long-term vision and legacy, which might involve revisiting your family's mission statement, values, and long-term goals.
Finally, once you have agreed on the updates, document these changes clearly and have a written record that all family members can easily reference.
This could be as simple as posting the updated charter on your family refrigerator or updating your family's website with the latest PDF.
Either way, after updating the document, it’s crucial to make a plan for regular future reviews because this ongoing process will ensure that your family charter remains a dynamic and relevant tool for your family for generations to come.
Print Money from Your Family Tree with a Family Charter
You know, when it comes down to it, money does grow on trees when it grows on your family tree.
And while liquidity events or asset transfers are useful to this end, creating a family charter is even more crucial to this process because it serves as a roadmap that guides family members on how to effectively communicate, resolve conflicts, and adapt to life's changes.
Indeed, printing money is more than just accumulating financial assets, it's about fostering a collaborative and supportive environment where each member is committed to the family's long-term vision and prosperity.
And this commitment extends beyond immediate family to include a broader community network, which reinforces the idea that wealth is not just measured in monetary terms, but also in the strength and unity of relationships.
So then, by laying a strong foundation with a family charter, you can not only ensure that your family tree bears fruit for generations, you can take one step closer to becoming the master of your own financial independence journey.
Why Knowledge is the Best Family Gift to Give this Year
With Christmas just days away, some of you may be scrambling to find that last perfect gift for your family this year.
Well, before you head out the door for one last purchase, let me suggest giving the gift of knowledge this year.
You see, if you're planning to leave behind any measure of wealth to your loved ones after you pass, then giving the gift of knowledge is crucial to this end.
And why's that?
Well, that's because asset transfers without knowledge transfers can lead to failed wealth transfers.
And you know the trouble is that many well-intentioned individuals aim to build generational wealth but are often doomed to failure because they focus solely on the money.
And so, what's the big deal?
Can't you just put a complex legal structure in place to ensure that assets go where they need to from now and into near-perpetuity?
Well, the trouble is that when wealth is handed down without a purpose, without a story, it risks becoming just a mere number.
"Shirtsleeves to shirtsleeves in three generations," as the saying goes.
And so, why does this outcome seem so inevitable?
Well, it's because wealth without wisdom is like a ship without a compass.
Indeed, imagine amassing a fortune to be enjoyed by family members not even born, yet the next generations squander it because they can't appreciate what the money's about.
It's painful, right?
So, what should you focus on to prevent this outcome?
Focus on transferring knowledge.
To be sure, giving the gift of knowledge this holiday season is crucial because it ensures that the next generation knows the importance of each dollar, the story behind every investment, and the gravity of how financial responsibility can be the difference between fleeting wealth and supporting a lasting legacy.
Knowledge Transfer and Generational Wealth
Now, if you're like many highly driven individuals out there, you've likely toiled relentlessly throughout your career or business ventures, and so, in a way, the wealth you've amassed is a testament to your resilience, determination, and the vision that you've built for your life.
In fact, over the years, you've likely pulled yourself up by your bootstraps and accumulated significant assets over the years, and now, you're ready to leave behind a legacy to give the next generation a leg up, right?
Well, while it might seem like you've already done the heavy lifting, the truth is that the hard work has only begun.
And why's that?
Well, that's because preparing to pass on wealth without instilling in your family what it took you to attain it will likely not only set your family up for failure but could also set the stage for future generational poverty.
How so?
Well, think of your wealth as a mighty tree you've cultivated from a single seed from the beginning of your adult life.
You alone likely understand the right amount of sunlight, water, and soil conditions necessary to grow that sapling into a towering tree.
Now, imagine entrusting someone with this tree without imparting the knowledge you've acquired over the years.
Certainly, your heirs might benefit from its fruits for a while.
But, in their uninformed hands, without understanding its specific needs, your family might neglect its essential care and expose it to harsh conditions or even fail to protect it from pests, leading this once thriving, fruit-bearing tree to wither away and die.
In the same way, while fruitful now, your wealth is closely tied to the strategies, risks, and lessons you've encountered in your own journey to financial independence.
Indeed, without instilling the values that helped build your wealth into the people who will eventually receive your assets, there's a risk that generations to come might not fully comprehend the significance of their inheritance, leading to potential mismanagement and eventual loss of your wealth entirely.
Shirtsleeves to Shirtsleeves
Now, by this point, you might be thinking to yourself, "You know, I'll just work with an attorney and set up a complex estate plan, and my family should be all set, right?"
Well, the truth is that no matter what sort of complicated legal structure you put in place, without the right guidance, your heirs likely won't be able to enjoy the fruits of your labor for very long.
Indeed, according to a study by the Williams Group of more than 3,200 wealthy families, 70 percent of families will lose their wealth by the second generation, and 90% will lose their fortunes during the lives of the third generation.
And if the data isn't enough to convince you, then you can take it from sayings that span cultures that wealth often doesn't last beyond the third generation.
Indeed, the term "shirtsleeves to shirtsleeves" is often used to illustrate the fleeting nature of wealth not grounded in a solid foundation.
And what exactly does this saying mean?
Well, it means that the first generation works hard and saves money, the second generation maintains or spends it, and by the third generation, the money is gone, and your family is back to where it all started.
In simpler terms, it's like a cycle where a family goes from being poor to rich and then back to being poor again in three generations.
That's why it's essential to have a plan in place to transfer the knowledge you've acquired so that future generations not only know how to be a good steward of your wealth but also how to make good decisions with it.
Formal vs. Informal Knowledge Transfers
Alright, so now that you understand why it's essential to have a knowledge transfer plan in place, let's talk about two ways to pass this knowledge down, and here we’re talking about formal and informal transfers.
Formal Knowledge Transfers
So then, where do we begin with a formal knowledge transfer?
Well, here we're talking about the structured transfer of hard knowledge.
Family Group Meetings
And one way to undertake this approach is to jump right in, and bring in a financial professional who can teach your family the basics and keep them informed about various developments in your financial affairs.
Now, you might be thinking, "Why a group setting?"
Well, these meetings are more than just lectures. They're a space for your family to come together, share concerns, ask questions, and learn as a unified front.
Indeed, with a seasoned financial expert at the helm, your family is not just consuming information but actively participating in discussions that directly relate to your unique family story.
In a way, it's like having a guided conversation about your family's financial history, financial present, and financial future, all in one room. Think of it as a family reunion but with a purpose that goes beyond bonding and includes intentional knowledge transfer centered on how the wealth was created and what it could be used for.
One-on-One Financial Planning
In some situations, personal nuances related to your estate might get lost in a group setting, and so that's where one-on-one financial planning meetings with your heirs come into play.
Now, these meetings allow each family member to understand their role and responsibilities, as well as the nuances of the wealth they'll eventually steward.
At the same time, it allows them to grasp the intricacies of their coming financial responsibilities and ask questions that might be too specific and counterproductive in a group setting.
Classroom-based Learning
Finally, when it comes to formal knowledge transfers, you could consider instruction-based learning.
In this situation, there's a formal, standardized curriculum presented to family members in a systematic way.
Now, you might be thinking to yourself, "Isn't this just like school?"
Well, in essence, yes, but it's a school specifically designed for understanding your family's financial situation and what it will take to keep it growing from one generation to the next.
Now, these structured courses lay down the foundation of financial knowledge, from understanding the basics of investments to the complexities of taxation and wealth preservation.
And, while seemingly complex, this approach can equip your family with the tools, resources, and insights to help navigate the tricky waters of managing generational wealth.
Informal Knowledge Transfers
Alright, so now that we've covered a little about formal knowledge transfers, let's stop right here.
That’s because, at this point some of you might be thinking to yourself, “my wealth or family situation might not warrant this level of detail or structure.”
Or, when it comes down to it, your family might not care that much about the technicalities of money management.
Now, if this is your situation, then this is where informal knowledge transfers come into play.
And what exactly are we talking about here?
Knowledge Transfers through Traditions and Rituals
Well, while formal knowledge transfers are all well and good, the fact is that the information retention rate of these events tends to decline precipitously after they take place.
However, the good news is that knowledge transfers through informal means, like family traditions and rituals, are likely to improve knowledge retention rates and increase buy-in from most family members.
And, so, what's so special about family traditions?
Well, family traditions and rituals tend to create an intimate and emotionally charged environment.
So then, when you gather for special occasions, the bonds between family members deepen, fostering a sense of trust and open communication.
What's more, unlike formal education, which can sometimes feel distant and detached, these family moments encourage candid conversations and the sharing of personal experiences.
At the same time, family traditions and rituals provide a historical context for wealth and legacy.
How so?
Well, as you participate in these time-honored practices, your family gains a firsthand understanding of your values, your principles, and the stories that have shaped your wealth journey.
And this context is crucial for understanding the purpose and responsibilities associated with generational wealth, which can often be lost in a purely academic setting.
Indeed, the emotional and psychological impact of family traditions can't be overstated. That's because these gatherings instill a sense of belonging and identity, reinforcing your commitment to preserving the family's legacy.
At the same time, this emotional connection serves as a powerful motivator for responsible money management and philanthropic endeavors among most family members, which is central to generational wealth transfer planning.
How to Use Family Traditions
Alright, so by now you likely appreciate how an informal approach like traditions and rituals can be more effective than formal approaches that involve classroom settings when it comes to knowledge transfers.
So then, how exactly do you go about building family traditions centered around wealth if your family doesn't really have any traditions to begin with?
Create Your Family Narrative
Well, you can start by creating your family narrative.
And, what is a family narrative?
Well, you can think of it as the collection of shared experiences, values, and beliefs that's more than just tales told around a dinner table, but instead, serves as oral tradition providing direction and grounding for the entire family.
And why is this important?
Well, when your family has a solid understanding of its past, and how your values shaped the decisions you've made over the years to build your wealth, then future generations likely will understand what it will take to steward their generational wealth for decades to come.
Another thing that your family narrative does is that it helps build emotional resilience through vicarious learning.
How so?
Well, you know, every story of triumph, every lesson from a failure, and every moment of perseverance equips the next generation with the emotional tools they'll need to navigate the challenges of handling money.
It's like a beacon, illuminating the fact that money, while abundant in opportunities, is also laden with responsibilities and potential pitfalls. But more than that, it shows future generations that previous generations have blazed certain trails, making them realize that they have what it takes to continue the family legacy.
And you know, this shared narrative does more than just teach, it connects.
And why is this important?
Well, in an era where individualism is often celebrated, a collective family story fosters unity. It offers a sense of belonging and reminds every member of their roots and the journey their ancestors undertook to get you here.
So then, as asset transfer can sometimes stir tensions, this shared narrative actually becomes a unifying force, ensuring that while assets might change hands, the bond of the family remains unbroken.
Alright, so by now, you likely appreciate how essential it is to build traditions centered around your family narratives.
But, now, the big question here is, how exactly do you go about building these narratives?
Host Storytelling Evenings
Well, one approach to consider is simple storytelling to share your family's journey.
And what does this look like?
Well, it’s crucial to start somewhere away from the glimmer and temptation of shiny screens, like your living room or around the dining room table. Then, dive in by telling your own tales of life's hardships, triumphs, and the moments that led to your newfound wealth and the purpose of your money.
Over time, this practice will instill in younger family members an appreciation for the origins of your family's affluence and provide a context that paints a vivid picture of perseverance, hard work, and wise decision-making to keep the money and family together.
Now, when sharing tales about your family's financial journey, it's essential to highlight the challenges, risks, turning points, and values that paved the way to your family's wealth.
To be sure, it's crucial to convey not just the successes but also the ethos and principles that influenced pivotal decisions in life's darkest moments.
Organize Financial Education Retreats
Another way to share your family narrative is to take your family on an annual retreat where the focus isn't just relaxation but also financial education.
This informal approach can be used to offset the formal approach of the classroom or the instructional delivery approaches we discussed earlier.
Now, it's crucial to be mindful in these scenarios because the focus should be more on building your narrative and story, and less on educating your family.
That's because the last thing you want to do is to bore your family to death on vacation, and leading them to forget everything they learned. So then, instead of offering generic money lessons, make it personal and weave in good and bad experiences that affected your family's wealth.
How so?
Well, if your wealth grew from a smart real estate investment, share that story and then dive into the principles of real estate. This way, the retreat becomes a mix of personal tales and actionable financial insights, ensuring that younger family members are both connected to the past and prepared for the future.
And, in a situation like this, you can make it more memorable by choosing a serene environment, away from daily distractions, whether it's a secluded beach house, a cabin in the woods, or a countryside villa that fosters focus and reflection.
Establish Philanthropic Endeavors
Now, another way to ground and share your family's narrative is to touch on those moments where you may have received assistance from others.
Remember, we rarely get to where we're going in life on our own. All of us need some form of help from time to time.
That's why it's essential to instill the value of giving back as part of your knowledge transfer process.
Now, one way to build a tradition around your family narrative is to bring the family together to support a cause that’s tied to the support you received early in life.
This could include funding scholarships at your local community college or providing support to counseling or family therapy practices.
Either way, whatever your chosen endeavor, your aim should be to teach the next generation not just the importance of wealth but also its power to effect change.
At this same time, this approach imparts skills related to altruism, decision-making, and understanding the broader positive impact of money that will be essential for stewarding your wealth for generations to come.
And so, where do you start?
Well, you can start by identifying causes that resonate with your family's values or familu history.
Think about a specific challenge your ancestors faced that you'd like to address. Or, if you'd rather not think of one, then maybe consider a modern-day social issue you're passionate about and want to support.
And if you need more help figuring out how to give wisely, be sure to check out our resources on developing a solid giving strategy.
Either way, your philanthropic ventures should be more than just donating money. It should encourage family members to volunteer their time or talents, which can foster a deeper connection to a cause and instill a genuine understanding of the small dent that your family is making in the universe.
Knowledge Transfers are Crucial to Creating Generational Wealth
You know, when it comes down to it, passing down wea lth from one generation to the next is simple, but it's not easy.
To be sure, many well-intentioned individuals strive to build generational wealth, but their efforts end up falling short.
And this is not for lack of planning, but often, because of a lack of knowledge and buy-in from heirs generations down the road.
You see, generational wealth isn't just about bank balances or real estate holdings.
It's also about distilling the grit, perseverance, and deep thinking that allowed you to build your wealth and then sharing that knowledge with your family through stories, experiences, and values.
Indeed, while it might seem daunting now, just know that the value in the traditions, rituals, and teachings you instill today can ensure that each successive generation takes one step closer to becoming the masters of their own financial independence journey.
6 Tips for Childhood Financial Literacy
Helping your children learn to manage money at a young age can provide them with a solid foundation and teach them the true value of money. Remember, teaching your child about finances at a younger age will provide them with a better understanding of the role that money plays in their everyday lives. If you are looking for ways to help your children start managing their money, consider the tips listed below.
1. Be a Good Financial Role Model
Children learn best by modeling the behavior that they see from their parents. This means the first step is examining your own attitudes about money and how you handle it, especially in front of your children. Always be mindful to set a good example and make sure to take advantage of teaching moments that you encounter along the way.
2. Provide Your Child With an Earned Allowance
Your child needs to know that they receive money by working for it. For younger children, you can provide them with an allowance for simple tasks such as making their bed, clearing their dishes, etc. As they get older, you can assign them more difficult household tasks. This allowance should be their spending money, and they should be allowed to spend it on what they choose. Use the allowance as a teaching tool and let them know if they plan for what they want, they can save up their money and buy it.
3. Help Your Child Start Their Savings
A crucial part of learning to manage money is understanding the value of savings and how to save to meet your wants and needs. Teaching your child to put their money aside to build until they have what they need to to make their purchase can not only show them how saving their money can result in them getting what they want and need but also teaches them patience and discourages impulse spending.
4. Teach Your Child About Credit Early
Credit problems are one of the biggest financial issues that young adults have to deal with. This is often due to a lack of understanding of how the credit process works. When credit is misunderstood, it is often viewed as free money, and young adults fail to realize how much it costs them both regarding their ability to borrow and how much they will really end up owing. When your child enters their teen years, considering loaning them money for something they need. Then structure a repayment schedule as a deduction from their allowance, having them also keep track of the balance each week until the debt is fully paid.
5. Show Your Child the Benefits of Being a Wise Consumer
One of the biggest parts of managing money is controlling spending. This can mean making the best choices when it comes to making purchases and also deciding whether or not the value of the item is worth it. When your child wants something, discuss with them if they think they need the product or will use it for a while or see if they were perhaps just swayed by heavy advertising. The why behind a purchase is very important in determining if it is a wise purchase. Once they have decided the product is worth buying, help them to learn to comparison shop to get the best price.
6. Set Budgets and Stick to Them
While every parent loves to spoil their children, buying them what they want all the time is setting them up for failure in the future. You should always set budgets and limits when you can and stick to the budget so your child can learn to make choices and understand that staying in budget is important. Budgets can be used for special occasion outfits, back to school shopping, or when planning a party.
Even though it is your job to provide for the needs of your child, it is also your responsibility to teach them about finances and money so that they can have a successful future. By following the six tips above you can set a good foundation that helps your child understand how to manage their money as well as the importance of doing so.










